Memphis-Style Coleslaw

mayonnaise (side note: why, oh why does regular mayonnaise have to taste so much better than low-fat?)

Dijon or whole-grain mustard

apple cider vinegar

sugar

heaping tsp. Kosher salt (or an even 1/2 tsp. of table salt)

grated onion

celery seed (absolutely essential for classic coleslaw flavor)

bag shredded cabbage with carrots (stay away from the very fine shreds because they’ll get too soggy)

minced green bell pepper

carrot, peeled and grated